Nov 24

Last weekend my family and I traveled to Goa for a cousin’s wedding. It was probably one of the craziest things my family has ever done or will ever do. The girl, who is my first cousin is a Zoroastrian, a set of people who migrated from Iran but have been in India for the past few centuries, was marrying a Goan boy, from a well to do Goan family in Aldona, Goa.

So this is what happened… We arrived two days before the actual ceremony began, as my mother had conveniently volunteered all our help, my sister and I were looking forward to a relaxing weekend hoping to drop by at the local market known for its clothes and bags, much to our surprise we were put on duty the night we arrived. The couple had mutually decided to have all the religious and legal ceremonies, which meant the Goan as well as the Zoroastrian functions, as well as the Court marriage.

After two laborious days of running here and there it finally began. The first was an official engagement for the girl’s side of the family where the boy goes and asks the girl’s father for permission to marry her. The couple then exchange rings and “Monu Mithu” themselves which means that they feed each other sweets to celebrate the Official engagement. The girl’s side then visits the boys side and does the same, where gifts are exchanged and a great spread of food is laid down for the ravenous.

After a most fulfilling lunch we followed with the traditional Siesta time and all slept for a good few hours to gain energy for the evenings events. The evening was spent celebrating with dance, beautiful lights and gorgeous Sarees and dresses to die for.

 Everyone let down their hair and drank to merryment, as tradition goes. The amusing part was that there were actually two different celebrations on the same evening. The Goan side of the family celebrate the eve of the wedding, whereas the Zoroastrian side were celebrating that their daughter had found a suitable partner!

As the next day was to begin early with a wedding mass at ten, the evening wound up ending surprisingly early, and the entire family went to their respective homes to prepare last minute for the next day. The day dawned beautifully with warm rays and a few clouds. The church was garlanded with orchids and white lilies on every window, and a four tiered cake lay waiting to be cut under a stark white canopy. The groom was surprisingly early, and guests began trickling in by the time the ten chimes rang out. The mass began, while the bride and her entourage of bridesmaids took their time getting ready. As the mass ended, the choir took their place as the groom took his place at the Alter.

The wedding march rang out and Lia in her beautiful white corset gown walked hand in hand with her father who affably gave her away to Robin. The ceremony was more than memorable, the wine and cake cutting brought tears to more eyes than countable, and best of all the lunch seemed to last forever. The exquisite spread of typical Goan and Zoroastrian food came as a surprise to the guests.

The couple danced their first dance, as did the mother and son and father and daughter dances take place, just before the beautiful couple dashed away to catch their flight to Mauritius. It was a tremendous effort on both the families to unite and provide exactly what the couple wanted, but they did an excellent job of it, and hats off to them!

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Nov 14

Hindu wedding ceremonies are traditionally conducted at least partially in Sanskrit, the language in which most holy Hindu ceremonies are conducted. The local language of the people involved is also used since most Hindus cannot understand Sanskrit. They have many rituals that have evolved since traditional times and differ in many ways from the modern western wedding ceremony and also among the different regions, families, and castes such as Rajput weddings and Iyer weddings.

The Hindus attach a lot of importance to marriages and the ceremonies are very colorful and extend for several days. In India, where most Hindus live, the laws relating to marriage differ by religion.

By the Hindu Marriage Act of 1955 passed by the Union Parliament of India, for all legal purposes, all Hindus of any caste, creed or sect, Sikh, Buddhists and Jains are considered as Hindus for the sake of the Hindu marriage Act – and can hence intermarry. By the Special Marriage Act, 1954, a Hindu can marry a non-Hindu employing any ceremony provided certain legal conditions are fulfilled.

The pre-wedding ceremonies include engagement (involving vagdana or oral agreement and lagna-patra written declaration), and arrival of the groom’s party at the bride’s residence, often in the form of a formal procession.

The post-wedding ceremonies involve welcoming the bride to her new home. Just as Hinduism is hard to grasp and contrast against the newer, book-defined, structured religions such as Christianity and Islam, India’s prevalent wedding traditions are also hard to categorize purely on a religious basis. They have a closer similarity to ancient cultures such as Greek, Roman, Persian, Egyptian and Chinese.

An important thing to note is that despite the fact that the modern Hinduism is largely based on the puja form of the worship of devas as enshrined in the Puranas, a Hindu wedding ceremony at its core is essentially a Vedic yajna (a fire-sacrifice), in which the Aryan deities are invoked in the Indo-Aryan style. It has a deep origin in the ancient ceremony of cementing the bonds of friendship/alliance (even among people of the same sex or people of different species in mythological contexts), although today, it only survives in the context of weddings.

The primary witness of a Hindu marriage is the fire-deity (or the Sacred Fire) Agni, and by law and tradition, no Hindu marriage is deemed complete unless in the presence of the Sacred Fire, seven encirclements have been made around it by the bride and the groom together.